2 posts tagged “ivf”
so, it's offical. we are trying for another baby. i've been having these "tentative" doctor appointments lately. because i'm over that magical medical age of 35, there are a few more - not guidelines, not restrictions, i'm not sure what the word is. but what it means for me is basically, i have lose and maintain the loss of at least one pound.
after that magical medical age of 35, in order for the clinic to maintain it's success and it's numbers, women undergoing fertility treatments need to mean a certian weight requirement. when we started meeting with our doctor to discuss IVF again, my weight was an issue. seriously, i was one pound over. they said absolutely not, you can't start, we can't treat you - lose the weight and we'll talk. they gave me two weeks to lose a pound. i lost four, but it was genuinely stressful because you can't just lose and keep off one pound. most humans lose and gain at least a pound through the course of a day. so you have to lose like three or four pounds and keep it off, to lose that one pound. seems pretty fucking ridiculous to me.
so the first weigh-in, i don't make it and they tell me to come back in two weeks. i come back in two weeks, and i was ounces shy. they started me anyway, but i got a call from my doctor basically telling me that instead of trying to get and keep off this one pound, why don't i take three months and lose 20 pounds. actually, she says, i'd like to see you under xxx lbs (which would be a loss of about 50 pounds for me). fifty pounds in three months is probably doable, but i'm not waiting that long.
thankfully, i've been on the pill for a few months, so i didn't need to start that. all i needed to do was take an extra week and start one of the drugs ( a SubQ shot in the AM). they didn't want me to start on the drug until i was under the "goal" weight. since i was ounces away, the let me start, but i had to come in and get weighed again. that's when i lost the four pounds and got the green light.
BUT - i have to keep it off. so on day 10 of this med (today), i had to go in again and get weighed and make sure that i'm keeping it off, before i start the actual stimulation meds on friday. and i did it.
when i went in for the sinus infection last friday, i had gained weight (according to their scale). then i spent the weekend eating burgers and chips and drinking wine poolside. sunday night i made a poundcake dessert with marscapone cheese. not exactly atkins here. wine counts as a fruit though right? because i'm definately having my three to five servings a day.
what all this means is that in 15-20 days, we'll be doing the retrieval and transfer. but between now and then, i have to do three shots a day, take oral medication, have blood tests done, have ultrasounds, etc. and i'm not even questioning if i can do it, or if i should do it. i have done it. it worked. i have no doubt on whether or not i should. i guess what's missing in all of this is sharing it with my mom. that's what chokes me up. well, that and continuing to lose weight - which in it's own way is harder that giving birth. i mean, giving birth is going to happen - losing weight, that's a choice.
hubbin was with me today at the appointment, we knew that if i didn't make the weigh-in today, that things absolutely would not happen this time (this month). and i continued to weep tears of gratitude, he held me close and told me he was proud of me. the first person who i wanted to call when i got in the car was my mom.
and guess what, i left that appointment to pick up my dad and annie oakley to drive them to the airport. they are going to phoenix to see the PBR this weekend. and dad knew what was going on, and he really want me to continue to "get healthier" as he puts it. but annie oakley broke me heart - she was so interested in what the process was, and how proud she was that i could do these shots, and how great boo is, and she almost choked up at the thought of a surrogate grand-baby.
it kills me, it absolutely kills me that she will probably be at the hospital with my dad at the birth of my next child. it should be my mom. by all rights and purposes, my mom should still be here. and i told her that as my heart broke, and i sobbed so hard my throat hurt on the home from droping them off at the airport.
this isn't going to make sense now, but soon it will....
in order to do IVF, you have to get dated. that's when they count forward from days 1-3 of your period to the date you become pregnant. all the testing and drugs take place somewhere between the two.
in order to get dated, certian things need to happen, tests, meetings, finances, etc. in my case, it was weight-loss. being that the last time i did all this, i was under the magical age of 35. now, over 35 - there are weight standards our clinic empoyes for their protection, as well as the patients. i was a wee bit over, three pounds over.
and after being on the pill for two months, i was worried that i wasn't going to make it. so last weekend i bought a scale, to start mesasuring myself. and when i got on it today, it showed me a good five pounds over what the doctors office had. needless to say, i am going with the doctors office scale.
so there it is, we should be getting a phone call now to get things moving, the tests, meeting and finances. and i have to take a shot giving class. back in the old days, it was all sub-q and you just pinched your skin, held the hypo like a dart and counted to three. now it's all automated - with an epi-pen. seven year olds use an epi-pen, so i'm not sure what all will be covered in the 45 minute class.
we'll see. but look out baby two - here we come.
